I feel a little thrown as I write this, as the father who is conducting the funeral tomorrow has left me a message asking if there are any special readings we would like at the service, and if so to bring them along. I hadn't thought of preparing anything, which leaves me feeling a little guilty and I'm concerned what else I might have forgotten. And while I'm impressed with the hospital's level of care for us, I'm a bit overwhelmed by the detail that is going into the funeral. I'm not sure it's entirely appropriate for the Boy and I - but perhaps it may become more so in time.
There are two poems that I have read since we lost baby Beans, which have made me think about our lovely baby in a happier light. Perhaps we can use one of them for the reading. I will discuss this with the Boy this evening and see what we would find the most useful. My heart aches with sadness and loss when I read the poems in my head, so I am fearful how hard tomorrow will be. But I suppose it must be thus, to let us mourn, say goodbye, and begin to walk out of the shadows and into the light once again.
The world may never notice if a snowdrop doesn't bloom,
Or even stop to wonder if the petals fall too soon.
But every life that ever forms or even comes to be
Touches the world in some way for all eternity.
The little one we longed for was swiftly here and gone,
But the love that was then planted is a light that still shines on.
And even though our arms are empty, our hearts know what to do.
Every beating of our hearts says that we both love you.
Gone Too Soon
This was a life that hardly begun.
No time to find your place in the sun.
No time to do all you could have done.
But we loved you enough for a lifetime.
No time to enjoy the world and its wealth.
No time to take life down off the shelf.
No time to sing the song of yourself,
Though you had enough love for a lifetime.
Those who live long endure sadness and tears,
But you'll never suffer the sorrowing years.
No betrayal, no anger, no hatred, no fears,
Just love, enough love for a lifetime.