Wednesday 15 August 2012

Maternity leave!

And so it begins... for the first time in 12 (long!) years, I am not in work. I am 35 weeks pregnant and a right old fatty (see above!) so it's time to take a few weeks annual leave with my feet up, and then for maternity leave to start.

It all feels a little surreal. I've spent more than a decade as an independent, committed, hard-working career girl - perhaps not quite Carrie Bradshaw, but I do think there have been a few similarities to Sex and the City along the way!

It's been a real journey for me, from an insecure, paranoid, shy and awkward youth, to a happy, confident, competent and professional force. There have been more than a few tears along the way and I will admit that at times things were so bad I did wonder if I had the resilience to keep going - but when I look back now I am so proud of myself. I did it. I grew, matured, achieved and conquered. I proved I was stronger than I ever knew, and in the end I had more than enough stamina for the road. And what I accomplished will never change.

But - as they say in Monty Python - "Now for something completely different". I finished work on Friday and now 13 months lies ahead me - a different page, waiting to be filled in a different way, with a different life and different experiences. In a few weeks - God willing - we will go from being two to three. I will be a Mum. The Boy will be a Dad. And we will be a family.

I can't wait. It feels like the world's biggest Christmas Eve. I lie awake at night wondering about what the future holds, and thinking about my Baby with some of the purest joy and excitement I have ever felt - what bub will be like, what it will look like, what it will enjoy doing, what the Boy will be like as a Dad... it's just beyond exciting and almost too much for my brain to take it and digest.

But digest it I do - bring it on! I'm as ready as I'll ever be and I can't wait to board the roller coaster for the ride of our lives.

And until then - well, I intend to take some time for myself, something I rarely do. I am going to sleep in, read (I have a bucket list of books to read before Baby Beans arrives!), meet friends for lunch, potter about in the flat (no, we haven't moved yet - more on that another time!) and cook some nice dinners for the Boy and I. I'm going to enjoy doing my hair, putting on make-up and nice clothes and having a few dates with the Boy and making the most of our last few weeks as a duo.

And those days spent with him as a team of two have been the best of my life - let's hope we grow even stronger as a threesome.

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